Looking for kink-aware support?
Meet Coach Kate: private, judgment-free kink-aware coaching for individuals and couples, with someone who already speaks the language. Online by video or anonymously, wherever you are.
Book a free 15-minute call
What people work on with Kate
Saying what you want. Naming a curiosity or a need out loud, without having to explain or defend it.
Raising it with a partner. How to bring up something new without pressure, and how to hear the answer.
Consent and negotiation. Agreeing what is on the table, what is not, and how either of you can pause or stop.
When interests don’t match. Finding what you both want, without anyone going along just to keep the peace.
When one partner is unsure. Every voice is heard, and “not now” is a real answer.
Kink alongside non-monogamy. Agreements that hold when more than two people are involved.
What clients say
Discussing intimate matters can often be uncomfortable, whether or not you have a coach, but with Kate, that awkwardness simply disappears. Her friendly demeanor and genuine, straightforward communication style alleviate any potential discomfort my partner and I might have felt, especially when delving into “touchier” topics. Kate approaches conversations without judgment, offering personalized tips and insights that align with our current stage in our journey of exploration. She makes everything feel approachable and exciting, creating a safe and welcoming space for open discussions.
R & S
Navigating the dynamics of ethical non-monogamy alone can be tough. Kate’s coaching techniques helped me to identify exactly what I wanted and needed in my interpersonal relationships, and gave me the strategies needed to move forward on my journey to relationship happiness! Thank you so much Kate!
Dominic D
Despite having lived in many of the world’s most socially progressive cities I have never met someone as knowledgeable or experienced in the many forms of non monogamy as Coach Kate. … This has helped me build a healthy and happy balance between my needs and the needs of my partner.
A L
About Coach Kate
Kate has lived non-monogamy for more than ten years, and has coached individuals and partners through opening up, jealousy, boundaries and new relationship structures. She has supported four couples from their first introduction through to marriage.
When it comes to kink, most people want someone who won’t flinch. Kate offers that in a coaching format: practical, consent-first and focused on your goals and next steps. Every partner is heard, and nobody is pushed toward anything they don’t want.
How it works
Start with a First Step Session
45 minutes by video to map where you are and what you want. The fee goes toward any package you choose within 30 days.
Get a clear plan
Kate recommends a single session or a package that fits your goals, your pace and your budget.
Work together, your way
Meet online from anywhere, or in person in San Francisco. Packages include check-ins between sessions.
First Step Session
$86–$107
Not sure where to start? In 45 minutes we map where you are, what you want, and the first moves that make sense for you. You’ll leave with clarity, and if we keep working together, the full fee goes toward your package.
7-day refund guarantee: if the session isn’t useful, email Kate within 7 days of it and she’ll refund the fee in full.
Book a First Step SessionQuestions people ask
What does kink-aware mean?
It means Kate treats kink as an ordinary part of some people’s relationships. You can say what you are curious about without having to explain or defend it, and the coaching stays on consent, communication and what each of you actually wants.
What happens in a First Step Session?
You talk through where you are, what you want and what is getting in the way. Kate asks questions, offers language and frameworks that have worked for other people, and helps you plan the next conversation or step. It runs 45 minutes, by video.
My partner is interested and I’m not sure. Can we still come?
Yes. Each partner is heard, and Kate never pushes anyone toward something they don’t want. Sometimes the outcome is a clear “not now”, and that is a good outcome too.
Do I need experience, or a label for what I’m into?
No. Many people arrive with a question and no vocabulary yet. Kate starts from where you are, at a pace that suits you.
Is it confidential?
Yes. Sessions are private and one-to-one (or with the partners you bring). Online sessions use a private video link and are never recorded.
Can I stay anonymous?
Yes, that’s no problem. You can keep your camera off and use any name you like, in the free call and in sessions. Share as much or as little as you want.
What does it cost?
The first 15-minute call is free. The 45-minute First Step Session costs between $86 and $107; the rate changes each Monday. After that, single sessions are $195 for one person and $265 for partners. Packages start at $695, and the First Step fee is credited toward any package bought within 30 days. See all options and prices.
Start with one conversation
Start with a free 15-minute call by video: tell Kate briefly what’s going on and see whether coaching is a good fit. If it is, the next step is a 45-minute First Step Session, with a 7-day refund guarantee.
Book a free 15-minute call
Kate is a coach with years of experience; she is not a licensed therapist. If you are looking for mental-health treatment, a licensed professional is the right fit, and some people work with both. Adults only (18+) · No physical or sexual services.